Committed: 


With 'The Project' seemingly complete (UPDATE: 'The Project' endures) I am now engaged in two ventures. ONE is a project for the good folks at TimeWarnerâ„¢. The other is a short film competition with some pretty odd rules. 

the NYC movie making madness contest (http://www.nycmidnight.com/) is more than just an ungainly mouthful of alliteration and fragmented sentence structure. Basically, at around midnight last night (this morning if you want to be a stickler for details) I recieved notice that I had to make a short (no more than 10 minute) film, and that it had to conform to a genre selected at random (in my case Horror) and the log line is "someone is being watched"

WHEW

Any of those near and dear to me (that's you dear reader) may already be aware that I am not an aficionado of the horror genre. I've seen 'em slash and dash and chop up teenage girls, but ultimately I don't really know where a nice suspense movie or thriller becomes a horror movie. Few would argue that Psycho is significantly different that Friday the 13th part X, but why?

TROMA

I hate Troma films. The Toxic Avenger, Ferocious Female Freedom Fighters, et al. Schlocky bottom feeding guffaw horror crap, I don't want to churn something out that will get laughs (unless its a comedy, and comedy is a different genre)

CLICHÉ

Someone is being watched? Thats been done so many times that it is it's own parody. We are lurking behind the tree watching the nubile form of last year's Miss October taking a 'nature walk' all alone on a moonlit night. Once or twice she employs the tricks she learned in acting class to look around "hello? Is there somebody there?" of course we don't answer (we're stalking and answering would be a no-no) she keeps on walking and for some reason (usually at the producer's insistence) she begins to remove articles of clothing "Oh, it's so warm tonight" she reads uh, says. Then she gets to naturally formed hottub down by the campsite. She takes her time getting into the bubbly water, thus guaranteeing us an "R" rating from the MPAA and quick sales to the home video market. Slowly we creep forward, we're careful not to hurry because we need a good 30 seconds of her enjoying the bubbles before we strike. Closer we draw and then stop, did we make a sound? "hello? Is there somebody there?" she repeats with same vacant tone she used before, covering herself, suddenly becoming modest and frustrating the hundreds of 14-year-old boys who are watching. Moments later she realizes it was probably just a feral badger or a squirrel with rabies and relaxes. By the time we are upon her, wielding an axe, machete, razor covered gloves, rusty red stapler or whatever, it's too late... she screams, blood splashes and the opening credits reveal that this is part 14 of whatever franchise we bought a ticket for.

IS THAT HORROR?
No, but it is horrible.

tw 

Posted: Sun - August 1, 2004 at 03:36 PM       @ toby

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